The Four C’s of a Great Marriage

by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio

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Hello and Happy Day! This is Dr. MaryAnn Diorio, novelist and life coach, welcoming you to another episode of Winning with the Word. Today is Monday, July 25, 2022, and this is Episode #30 of Series 2022. This episode is titled “The Four C’s of a Great Marriage.”

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My younger daughter was married two weeks ago to a wonderful, Godly man in a beautiful ceremony. The officiating pastor gave a wonderful message on the three C’s of marriage: Companionship, Commitment, and Covenant. I would like to expound on that message here and add another C: Communication.

Let’s explore each of these four C’s of a great marriage one by one.

1. COVENANT. The most important point about a marriage is that it is a covenant. A covenant is more than a contract. According to Noah Webster’s 1828 Dictionary, the precursor of today’s Webster’s Dictionary, a covenant is “a binding agreement.” In other words, a covenant imposes an obligation on the part of each party to keep the agreement until the death of one of the parties.

Whereas a contract involves two people, a covenant involves three: the man, the woman, and God. Because God is involved in a covenant, it is deemed by Him to be unbreakable. Hence, His warning in Mark 10: 9 NASB: “Therefore, what God has joined together, no person is to separate.” A covenant, therefore, is sealed with a vow before God to honor the covenant until death. 

2. COMMITMENT. The strength of a marriage depends on the integrity of the husband and the wife to remain committed to the marriage no matter what the cost of that commitment. Every marriage will have its trying times. Trials are part of God’s plan to conform us to the image of Christ. Just as making a muscle strong requires repeated resistance, so does making a marriage strong require repeated trials. 

One of the most important lessons I’ve learned about marriage and about life, in general, is that God’s goal for us is not our happiness but our holiness. Trials help to make us holy if we maintain the Biblical perspective toward trials. Trials are for our spiritual growth. But whether we grow or not through our trials depends on our attitude toward them. 

Something amazing happens when we resist and overcome trials. We not only become holy; we also become happy.

3. COMMUNICATION. Good communication is key in cultivating a good marriage. The Bible is full of principles for good communication. Here are a few of them:

__James 1: 19 – “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” 
__Proverbs 10: 19 – “When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.”
__Proverbs 12: 18 – “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

4. COMPANIONSHIP. When the three elements above–Covenant, Commitment, and Communication–are put into practice, then beautiful, intimate companionship follows. Companionship is oneness of soul. The Word says that in a marriage, the two become one flesh (Mark 10: 8). The flesh is comprised of both the body and the soul. Therefore, “one flesh” does not mean only physical oneness. It also means oneness of soul. 

My husband and I have been married for 52 years. We continually implement these four C’s of marriage, and we can tell you that they work. A good marriage is built by keeping Christ at the center of your life and at the center of your marriage.

If Jesus is not yet the center of your life, make Him so right now. Pray this simple prayer with me:

Lord Jesus, I repent of my sin. I want to make You the Center of my life. I ask You to forgive me and to cleanse me of all unrighteousness. I receive You now as my Savior and my Lord. Thank You for saving me. In Your Name I pray. Amen.

If you sincerely prayed this prayer, welcome to God’s family! Please write down today’s date. It is your spiritual birthday. And please write to me at drmaryann@maryanndiorio.com. I would like to send you a free PDF booklet, titled After You’re Born Again. This booklet will help you to get started in your walk with Jesus.

I also encourage you to get yourself a Bible and read it every single day. The Bible is God’s love letter to you, His manual for your life. In the Bible, God reveals Who He is, and He teaches you how to live.

Finally, ask the Lord to lead you to the church of His choice for you where you can learn Truth and experience fellowship and encouragement with other Christ-Followers. It is critically important in these last days to fellowship with other believers who are mature in Christ and who can guide you as you grow in Him.

If this podcast has helped you in any way, please consider supporting it by becoming one of my valued patrons. Just go to patreon.com/winningwiththeword to join my wonderful Team. Patrons receive numerous benefits in appreciation for their support. 

Until next time, remember that God loves you just as you are and just where you are, and that He will help you to keep on Winning with the Word!
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Copyright 2000-2022 by MaryAnn Diorio, PhD. All Rights Reserved.

SECRETS OF A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE

by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio

Guard your heart above all else,
for it determines the course of your life.” ~ Proverbs 4: 23
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Last month, my husband and I celebrated our 48th wedding anniversary! Praise the Lord!

Young people often ask us how we stayed married for so long. While I can understand this question, given that those who ask it are usually Millennials, I still find it strange.

You see, my husband Dom and I grew up in an era when divorce was rare, and couples entered marriage with the mindset that they would make it work, no matter what. Divorce was not an option on our radar. Lifelong commitment was!

So, today I’d like to share a few reasons that my husband and I have built a strong marriage, a marriage that gets stronger every single day:

1) Both of us entered marriage with the firm conviction and the unwavering commitment that divorce would never be an option. Period! 

2) Both of us entered marriage with the attitude that marriage is not 50-50 but 100-100.  Each of us gives 100% to the other. We do not measure or keep score of what we do for each other. When we see a task that needs to be done, the one who is available and able to do it at the moment does it.

3) Both of us understand that marriage was instituted by God and is meant to reflect Christ’s love for the Church. We seek, therefore, to be a witness for Jesus Christ in and through our marriage. We put Him first in each of our lives, and we put Him first in our marriage. Each of us starts the day spending time in God’s Presence through worship, prayer, and Bible study. We also study the Word together, pray together, and attend church together.

4) Both of us understand that Satan hates marriage and will do whatever he can to destroy marriages, especially Christian marriages. When the enemy attempts to cause problems in our marriage–as he does in all marriages–we remember that we are not at odds with each other but that we are a team united against a common enemy who is out to destroy us. Because we are in Christ, we expect to overcome every single time because Jesus has already defeated Satan. Hallelujah!

5) Both of us do our best to laugh at least once a day–usually several times a day. My husband has a great sense of humor and can find humor in almost any situation. I have learned from him to look for the humor in the mundane, although I usually “get” jokes about a week after I hear them. 🙂

6) Both of us have learned to respect and honor our differences and to capitalize on them. As my husband has often said, “If we were exactly alike, one of us wouldn’t be necessary.”

7) Both of us have learned that love is, first and foremost, a decision and not a feeling. Love is an act of the will–a decision to put the other’s needs above one’s own, no matter how we may feel at the moment.

8) Each of us has learned to treasure the other as a unique creation of God. We respect each other as a precious child of God, and we do our best to treat each other with the constant knowledge that we will have to answer to God for how we treated His child.

Marriage takes work. God’s primary goal in marriage–and in life, in general–is not to make us happy but to make us holy. As we yield to our Lord, obeying His will as revealed in His Word, we will have not only deeply enriching marriages but also deeply enriching lives. The choice is ours!

Now it’s YOUR turn! What are your secrets for a successful marriage? Please comment in the box below. Thanks! 

TWEETABLE: “Secrets for a Successful Marriage” by Dr. MaryAnn Diorio (CLICK TO TWEET)


In my latest novel, RETURN TO BELLA TERRA, heroine Maria Landro learns one of the secrets of a successful marriage. 


A mother, her son, and the man who threatens to come between them . . . 

Available now on Amazon.

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Matters of the Heart is a weekly blog that deals with the deepest issues of the human heart, the issues we all face but sometimes don’t want to talk about. The heart is the programming center of our lives. What is programmed into our heart will affect every area of our lives. Learn how to discover what is in your heart and how to program your heart for success.

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