The Self-Righteous Spouse

September 11, 2025

Hello and Happy Day! This is Dr. MaryAnn Diorio, Novelist and Life Coach, welcoming you to another episode of Winning with the Word. Today is Thursday, September 11, 2025, and this is episode #17 in Series 2025. This episode is titled, “Get Real and Heal: The Power of Authenticity

Before we get into our message for this week, I want to extend a warm welcome to all of our new subscribers around the world. By the grace of God, Winning with the Word now reaches 85 countries all over the globe! Praise the Lord and glory to God!

I want you to know how much I appreciate your support, and I trust that Winning with the Word blesses you and encourages you during these difficult end times. Please share this podcast and blog with your family and friends. I would love to bless them and encourage them as well.

And please check out my online bookshop at shop.maryanndiorio.com for a wide selection of heart-warming books that will bring healing, hope, and happily-ever-after to your life.

Now on to this week’s message.

Authentic! We hear that word thrown around a lot these days. But what does it really mean to be authentic? According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, authentic means not false or an imitation; true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character. As we say here in New Jersey, authentic means what you see is what you get.

An authentic person is sincere and without pretension. He is transparent and trustworthy. In other words, you can count on the fact that he says what he means and he means what he says. You don’t have to read between the lines with an authentic person. He will always speak the truth.

So, why is authenticity so important in cultivating a healthful relationship? Here are three reasons:


How Authenticity Builds Relationships

1_Authenticity eliminates confusion. Confusion is one of the chief hindrances to a good relationship. Confusion hinders understanding, and we all know that understanding is a major key to a healthful relationship. When the communication is not clear, it is difficult to know how to solve a problem. Authenticity eliminates confusion and promotes clarity.
nd clarity is essential to understanding one another in a relationship. When we are authentic in our relationships, people know where we stand. When people know where we stand, they are able to trust us.

2_Authenticity fosters trust. Without trust, a relationship cannot get off the ground, let alone survive. One of my favorite passages is the story of Nathaniel. Let’s read directly from the Word, start in John 1: 45 NIV:

“Philip found Nathanael and told him, ‘We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, and about whom the prophets also wrote—Jesus of Nazareth, the son of Joseph.”

“Nazareth! Can anything good come from there?” Nathanael asked.

“Come and see,” said Philip.

“When Jesus saw Nathanael approaching, he said of him, ‘Here truly is an Israelite in whom there is no deceit.’”

What a compliment from the Son of God Himself to say that there was no deceit–no guile–in Nathaniel. Nathaniel was blunt. He said what he meant and meant what he said. What you saw with Nathaniel is what you got. He was honest. Transparent. True. He was authentic.

There is another very interesting implication in this passage that is easy to miss. Because of Nathaniel’s authenticity, Jesus described him as without deceit. The implication here is that when one is not authentic, one is acting in deceit. And to deceive is to lie.

When one is deceitful about who he is, he is lying to the other person in the relationship. Relationships cannot be based on deceit or else they will eventually and always crumble.

So to be authentic is to be without deceit.

3_Authenticity engenders loyalty. We north-easterners have a reputation for being gruff. But when you really get to know us, you realize that we are not being gruff at all. We are just being cautious before we give you our trust. Here in the Northeast—and I’m talking specifically about New York and New Jersey where I live—we are suspicious of strangers. But when we get to know you well and feel confident that we can trust you, you have found a friend for life.

As I mentioned earlier, what you see is what you get with us North-easterners. We don’t pull punches. We speak our minds, and we speak them bluntly. People from other parts of the country often comment that they like the fact that they know where we stand.

Knowing where a person stands engenders trust in that person. We know that the person will be predictable. He will not suddenly shift direction and become something other than who he is. When we know we can trust someone, we are not afraid to be loyal to that person.

And loyalty is the glue of relationships.


The Three Benefits of Authenticity

So, my friend, remember these three points about authenticity:

1__Authenticity eliminates confusion.
2__Authenticity fosters trust.
3__Authenticity engenders loyalty.

When your communication is clear, your trust is unequivocal, and your loyalty is secure, you will experience the great joy of a healthful and solid relationship that will bring glory to God and joy to your heart.

For a fictional example of a character who struggled with the seeming deceit of the man she loved, read my award-winning novel, Miracle in Milan. Details follow at the end of this post.

Until next time, remember the Golden Rule of great relationships: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.

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Love. Betrayal. Redemption. And a choice that could change everything.

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Set in the enchanting city of Milan, this story delves into themes of trust, forgiveness, and the redemptive power of God’s love in the face of betrayal, guilt, and second chances.

📖 The Story

Amy Torelli, Chief Auditor for Enson Pharmaceuticals in New York City, is sent on assignment to Milan, Italy, to audit the company’s European branch. Reeling from her father’s betrayal, Amy has vowed never to trust a man again.

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As love blossoms between them, Amy uncovers shocking evidence: Ted may be involved in a massive embezzlement scheme. Now she faces an impossible choice—expose the man she’s falling for, or compromise everything she stands for.

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💔 Themes That Resonate

  • Christian Romantic Suspense Set in Italy
  • Healing from Betrayal and Emotional Wounds
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From the bustling streets of Milan to its breathtaking art and architecture, Miracle in Milan immerses readers in the rich culture of Italy. But beyond the beauty, it’s the heart of the story that shines—a heart searching for healing, trust, and a love that can only be found through faith in Christ.

📦 Product Details

  • Title: Miracle in Milan
  • Author: MaryAnn Diorio
  • Genre: Christian Romantic Suspense / Inspirational Fiction

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PAPERBACK

EBOOK

AUDIOBOOK (Narrated by the Author)


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Copyright 2025 by MaryAnn Diorio, PhD, MFA. All Rights Reserved.